A friend gave me a lovely and
poignant birthday present (if there is such a thing), it was a plaque that read
‘QUEEN OF EVERTYHING’. As I read the sign, I saw the irony and laughed along
with everyone. I reflected to myself that
a mare few months ago this would have hit a raw nerve. The plaque reminded me of a decision I made
after having the twins some 8 years ago.
I decided then, that I would not be super woman. However over the years comments from friends was
sensitising me to the fact that perhaps, I was not winning this particular
battle.
I supposed like many other
mother, I had been juggling too many balls. Every now and then I would add another and
another, either out of guilt, self improvement or people pleasing. I arrived at a crossroads, where I had to face
some uncomfortable questions ‘why are you doing that? Who is it for? Do I
really need to be this busy? Was my business a smoke screen, design to shut out
something else? Some people keep busy
because it leaves little time to think or sometimes feel. Continuous activity keeps out the invariable
drip, drip of life. Things such as a
painful past, an uncomfortable conversation, situation or event can be blocked
out.
This reminds me of an incident I
had late one night. I was awake until
very late cooking for a party; as the house and street settled for the night,
certain noises became louder and that is when I heard it. The sound of a tap running, I stopped and
listened for awhile and the noise also stopped. I resumed my task and the noise
disappeared. I settled and it
reappeared, this continued for a while until I made the decision to stop and
listen intently. At this point the sound
came through clearly. I was able to identify the source and found the bathroom
tap running and was able to turn it off; this would have been running for
hours.
I reflected then about situations
in our lives, incidents of pain and brokenness that we shove to the background,
trying desperately to drown them out with the business of life. Some
use drugs both legal and illegal, some use work, the intensity of climbing the
career ladder, can keep one very busy and some engages in ‘working for God’. With all these activities, we might at times
succeed in pushing the noise to the background. However, other times it will hum louder and
louder refusing to be ignored. Breakdowns
and burnouts could be the result. Whatever
the medium used, nothing will be successful in covering the tip, tap of a pain
that needs addressing, a problem that needs fixing or a relationship that needs
mending.
I would encourage you to stop hiding,
putting off or ignoring that issue that needs dealing with. There are so many ways that God minister to
our emotional needs. He oftentimes uses
a person prepared to listen, a book, a card, a track, a sermon or a course.
There are countless ways that this can be done, If you can relate to this,
attend to that drip before it overflows. Stop long enough to investigate the
source of your unease and find help and support to attend to this need.
